Leading yourself first : before you can be successful at leading others.
Leading yourself is the first step in successfully leading others. Well, as far as I am concerned it is. To me, if you don’t want to follow you, why would anyone else.
When you think of a leader who do you think of? We all know that one person who seems to be born with great leadership skills. Yes, some seem to be born with leadership skills, but leadership is something that CAN be learned. Especially when it comes with leading yourself.
Whether you want to lead others or not. Maybe you just want to successfully lead yourself.
You just have to know where to start.
Having a leadership mindset.
Layla comes to work every morning. She works the 6-2 shift caring for senior citizens at an assisted living. Her work tasks are not always easy. She must start her day by helping some wake-up and prepare for breakfast. Her day then progresses with medication assistance, incontinent care, the constant “can you do this for me, I can’t do this for myself anymore”. Then on to cleaning and constant trash pick-up.
Some days, of course, are harder than others, but she knows that her day is determined by her mindset. She knows that there are going to be days that her coworkers are going to get bogged down in their jobs. They are going to have residents that take more of their time. She knows that things are going to be missed. Her coworkers are, on occasion, going to need help.
So, how is Layla going to look at her job when things like this happen?
Layla's Leadership Mindset
First, you will never hear her say, “not my job”. Layla has always taken a leadership mindset of servant first. Yeah, that is what I said...Servant. She knows to be a good leader, no matter her job title, she must first serve. How can Layla serve, by stepping up and helping her coworkers when she notices something has been missed or they are being bogged down. By being a team player. Serving her coworker and her residents.
Second, you will never see Layla care about the recognition. She does what she does because she knows it is right. Right according to her core values and important to the residents she serves.
Lastly, you will always find her stepping up with a solution-based approach to obstacles that she or her coworkers find themselves up against. She takes a step back and instead of waiting for someone else to solve the problem for her, she accesses the problem, puts some thought into it and then brings it to the table for discussion. Even if she is not in a position to make the final decision, she shows those who are in those positions that she is a forward thinker and working for the greater good of the organization.
In the example above,
Layla could literally work in any industry, and doesn't have to be a caregiver. With that being said, though, here Layla demonstrates having a leadership mindset. Something that even you can obtain for yourself by first learning to lead yourself.
So, how do you do that? Let’s start with knowing your core values.
Knowing your core values
You want to be a great leader, but like I said, “Where do you start?”.
Learn to lead yourself first.
In doing this you must know yourself. What is important to you? What motivates you? You must know your core values.
What are your core values?
Your core values are the principle that help you determine the life you want to live. They help you with your decision making. They are the compass you use to guide your path, helping you stay true to who you are.
Identifying your core values is important to both your personal growth and your leadership skills. It is something that will help create a road-map to follow when making decisions in both your personal life and business.
Now as you grow personally...
these values will change and that is okay. Your values will not be the same as everyone else's, either, and that is okay. Remember they are what is important to you.
My experience with core values.
In my personal life, I make decisions that support what is important to me. Something I have not always done, but with the day-to-day decision making, I realized that knowing them and understanding them made it easier to communicate and to motivate myself in general.
I did an Identifying Core Values exercise during a therapy session after my motorcycle wreck. Before then, no one had ever mentioned it to me. Yes, having good morals and strong beliefs were important, and I had heard plenty about those, but where were those morals and beliefs created? Possible from the development of my core values.
You will see that in identifying your own personal core values, you will then be able to consciously implement them into your leadership style.
If you want to learn more about identifying your core values, head over to the personal growth category and be watching for next weeks post... Identifying your Core Values. There you will be able to read more and download an exercise to help you identify your core values.
Leading yourself first
So, we have talked about having a leadership mindset and knowing your core values. Both of those will help you as a leader; starting with leading yourself first. Below you will find 4-steps to take at leading yourself. If you do these 4 things for yourself, you will be a witness to those around you. An example per say.
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Control your thoughts
I am a firm believer in the notion that “you are what you think”. Everything begins with a thought. Now does that mean positive thinking works all the time, no, but is there a high probability that negative thinking will affect you, yes. All of you. So, in your personal life and learning to lead yourself first, start with controlling your thoughts. Monitor your thoughts. Thoughts become feelings, feelings become actions, every time. Learn more here about CBT.
Do you look at situations with judgement? Do you complain a lot? Maybe you find yourself wrapped up in gossip and what other people do or don’t do. I once read a really good book about neutral thinking by Trevor Moawad called It Takes What It Takes, that you might want to check out. (This is not an affiliate link, just a good book.) Effective leaders are known for not letting these kinds of thoughts fill their mind and take up their precious time. If you are constantly focused on things that are not beneficial to your goals then your words and actions will begin to reflect that focus. Getting you nowhere fast.
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Step-up and take initiative
Initiative leads to advancement. In your personal life and in your work. We all know someone who has to be told what to do even though they see the same thing we do. They have the same facts and opportunity we do regarding the situation.
An effective leader, never hesitates. They take initiative, step-up and do what needs to be done for the good of the organization and those it serves. Even when it is not in their so-called job description.
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Create “great work” in all you do and prioritize.
We are all busy. It seems like our calendars are bursting at the seams. From our family life, to our work life, it seems to never stop. In your personal life or in your work life, the daily task and responsibilities for that day may constantly change. When this happens you must prioritize the important stuff first. Then you must complete your work to the best of your ability and seek to create “great work”. Work you will be proud of. Work that may not be perfect, but shows that you cared. That it was important to you.
In doing so, you will do several things. You will build your confidence in your abilities. It would show your family, friends, supervisors and/or coworkers that you take your work seriously and you are dependable.
You would, also, be able to observe the processes and see if there are changes that you could suggest that would make the procedure more efficient. Allowing you to take ownership in your work.
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Personal Growth
The one thing you can be sure of is CHANGE. No matter how comfortable you are with a situation, there is always a good chance things will change. You must always be ready to shift. Make changes yourself. Be prepared.
One way to do this is to always be seeking personal growth. Read books, listen to audio books. Listen to podcasts. Just do something to better yourself. Trust me there is always something to learn.
Set goals, prioritize your own personal growth as an individual and as a leader. I can not stress this enough.
Do you find yourself complaining about everything?
Where are your thoughts right now?
Are they proactive and focused on solutions?
It is hard to follow someone who just complains about everything and never offers a solution.
Would your personal life, relationships and such, or work life be better served if you stepped-up and led by example?
If you took initiative?
Do you find yourself waiting for someone to tell you what to do?
How do you expect someone to follow you if you don’t make the decision to take the first step at leading yourself?
I would hope that you are not an excuse maker and work hard to create work that you are proud of. It is so easy to pass the responsibility onto someone else, but that does not a great leader make. Lead by example.
No matter the position you hold, there are many places to be a great leader. That could be at home, in your relationships, at work in a leadership position or even if you are not in a leadership position. The key to all leadership is learning to lead yourself first.
